I sat down with Coach Davis for an hour talking about the playoffs and how he felt I had so much potential, but something was missing. He was listening to everything I said, but at the same time, he had this look of anticipation. He was waiting on me to say what I thought kept me from reaching that potential he spoke of.
"You've got a handful of colleges to choose from. You're going to go in as a 4th stringer, maybe 3rd. But, you'll stay right there unless you investigate yourself and find out what's holding you back." Coach then looked beyond me through the glass wall that seperated his office from the locker room. I turned to see what he was looking at. It was Jimmy. Coach nodded and gestured a "come on in" motion with his hand. Jimmy opened the door and took a seat beside me. "I'm not playing ball, man," Jimmy said with a straight face. "This is where I get off." I'm not sure what happeend then, but I hung my head over and starting weeping like I just lost my first love. Coach hit home, he knew just what it was and he took a chance at making me confront it.
It was supposed to be me and Jimmy, all the way. When his leg gave, everything was silenced. Everytime I stepped on the field, the reality of him not going any further than High School would haunt me. I let it get to me, and after a while, every ounce of success I had put a burden of guilt on me.
It wasn't soon after that Jimmy himself stood up, he too very emotional. He reached out his hand as if to help me up out of my chair. Both of us standing, we hugged and Jimmy said quietly, "It's all you man. It's all you."
There was a lot of weight taken from my shoulders that day. I could think a lot clearer now. My childhood dream was renewed. My next step was to sit down with mom and dad and talk about what the next few months would lead to.
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